Arrival & the 85-Year-Old Explorer
We touched down via charter—because some occasions demand you arrive not just to the wild, but with a proper sense of occasion. A brief bounce from Lusaka to Royal Airstrip, then a dusty flirtation with a Land Cruiser brought us to Zambezi Grande—a boutique, family-run lodge perched lazily on the riverbanks just outside Lower Zambezi National Park.
Our cast of characters: two teenagers buzzing with enthusiasm, my wife (ever the planner and safari realist), my newly-minted 85-year-old father-in-law—henceforth “Papa”—and me, glass of Shiraz in hand, wondering how many hippos it takes to tip a boat.
The lodge welcomed us with understated grace: timbered elegance, weathered leather armchairs, and staff who knew how to make a sundowner before you asked. No safari chic gimmickry here—just the sort of refinement that doesn’t have to shout.
Riverfront Reverie: Your Suite with the Hippos
With only ten rooms, Zambezi Grande walks the line between intimate and indulgent. Five Superior Suites (with tubs for soaking away the day’s dust) and five Luxury Rooms all facing the river’s silvered flow. We opted for a riverfront suite—a wise move, as it came with a hippo soundtrack and uninterrupted views of elephants crossing at dawn.
If you’re the type who prefers your wildlife at binocular distance and your coffee French-pressed, this place will feel like a well-kept secret.
Feasts, Gin, and the Unbearable Lightness of Tiger Fishing
Meals unfolded with the kind of unhurried elegance one hopes for on safari—unrushed, unfussy, and ideally timed between animal sightings and aperitifs. Breakfasts were languid, lunches delightfully civilized, and dinners sometimes veered into theatre: lanterns swaying, a breeze rustling the mopane, and the unmistakable chuckle of a hyena just at the edge of torchlight, clearly uninvited but entirely on brand.
We took our fishing seriously—well, some of us did. The guides offered top-quality gear and an optimistic glint in their eyes. What followed was a serene drift along the Zambezi, our lures out and our hopes high. Naturally, the fish had other plans.
The real thrill? A drowsy but disapproving hippo surfacing beside the boat, giving us the aquatic equivalent of a side-eye. He thankfully opted for indifference over drama. Papa’s celebratory G&T was well-earned—despite catching nothing but stories.
Game Drives & River Thrills
Wildlife, Minus the Waiting Room
The Lower Zambezi is the safari you whisper about to your friends—less crowded, more visceral. From the boat, we counted crocodiles stacked like driftwood, hippos galore, and birds that looked painted by an overzealous Victorian taxidermist.
On land, our guides—fluent in spoor and silence—led us to elephants, buffalo, sable antelope, lions, and one particularly arrogant leopard who stalked a bushbuck for an hour, only to miss his prize in the final pounce. Still, it was the kind of tension you can’t manufacture, even with popcorn.
And that lions jaunting around our vehicle? Enough to relocate your heart somewhere between your throat and your hatband.
Zimbabwe for a Drink? Why Not.
Because why not mark a milestone birthday by sneaking into Zimbabwe? We zipped across the river to Mana Pools, snapped a photo on yet another patch of foreign soil, raised a toast on a sandbar, and zipped back in time for dinner. There’s something gloriously absurd about international travel that involves both flip-flops and gin.
Spa, Serenity & Papa’s Nap Schedule
There’s no spa menu per se—just private, in-room massages, which are far superior to anything requiring slippers and lemon water. The kids played cards overlooking the river, the grownups sipped something delicious, and Papa took his customary afternoon nap—occasionally interrupted by the calls of African fish eagles.
Evenings bled into violet skies and mirrored water. It’s the kind of setting that demands you pause, sigh, and possibly reconsider your flight home.
🦴 The Highlights, Rated with Heart
| Category | Rating & Notes |
| Location & Setting | 9/10 – Wild and unfenced; wildlife regularly drifts past your porch. |
| Accommodation | 8/10 – Spacious, soulful, and splendidly situated. |
| Dining & Beverages | 7/10 – Pan-African with flair, though tiger fish was not on the menu (through no fault of the chef). |
| Guiding & Game Drives | 7/10 – Knowledgeable, composed, and genuinely passionate. |
| River Activities | 8/10 – Sunset cruises, hippo proximity, and sheer magic. |
| Wildlife Sightings | 7/10 – Plenty of action, less elbow-to-elbow vehicle clutter. |
| Overall Luxury Feel | 8/10 – Refined without peacocking. |
| Guide-to-Guest Ratio | Excellent – Think “private yacht” rather than “tour group.” |
Safari Cake & Hippo Choruses
Somewhere between elephant sightings and sundown, the staff conjured up a surprise birthday cake —complete with candles, champagne, and the occasional hippo grunt. Papa was moved. The Zambezi may be wild, but the hospitality here is anything but untamed.
Farewell, Zambezi
On our final morning, the river shimmered, the elephants sauntered past, and we knew—this was one of those places. The kind you return to in memory long after you’ve washed the red dust from your boots.
Zambezi Grande is not for box-checkers. It’s for the quietly adventurous, the romantics, the cross-generational celebrants of life. It’s where you go to do very little, very well.
A Few Notes from the Field
- Fishing fanatics: Bring your favorite tackle. Their gear is solid, but your lucky rod might tip the odds.
- Charter flights = minimal baggage: Pack like you’re channeling Karen Blixen’s toiletry kit.
- Best for kids 12+: Teenagers thrive here—especially if they like wildlife and loathe Wi-Fi.
- Cultural encounters: Ask about local village visits or heritage chats—Zambia has stories to spare.
How to Book
Ready to drift down the Zambezi yourself? You can learn more or make a reservation at 👉 www.zambezigrande.com.
Mention I Heart Safaris—you may score a deal, you may not, but either way, you’ll earn some serious cred.
